The Prince and the Shepherdess

Tol Eressëa, north of Avalonnë
Early Spring

Standing at the top of the sheer, rocky precipice, a chill wind ruffling and tossing the loose strands of his hair about his face, Elrohir gazed out across the Sea towards the east. His thumb absently rubbed across a small stone resting in his hand as his mind churned with memories of another place, loved ones lost but not forgotten.

He sensed rather than heard another approach and did not so much as flinch when a voice spoke at his side. "What do you seek across the water?" Elladan asked.

"Peace," Elrohir replied, not moving his eyes from the horizon. "I thought I would find peace here, but…" He shivered as another cold gust of air blew over him. Peace had eluded him – as had healing of the deep hurts to his very soul.

"Too many years spent fighting, Dúruth," Elladan agreed.

Elrohir glanced over at Elladan at the use of the epessë. Only among the two of them were those names ever used, for only the two of them comprehended the darkness within each of them. "Indeed, Candruth," Elrohir murmured, his eyes lifting to watch a flock of gulls as they swooped and cried on the ocean breeze. Below them, others paddled just beyond the surf where it crashed upon the rocks, fighting over what food they found. "Nasty creatures…gulls."

Elladan snorted. "Do not let Father hear you say that."

Elrohir turned with a frown, then realized what he had said. His snort echoed his brother's. "I meant no insult to Daernaneth Elwing, of course."

Elladan grinned at him, reaching up to pull his hair out of his face as another blast of cold air gusted over them. "Of course."

A comfortable silence descended on them as they both looked out across the waves. After a time, Elladan spoke again. "What did you think would bring you peace? Just being here? Perhaps there is more to it… Maybe it is time we sought some function here? Found a purpose?"

A curl of doubt twisted in his belly, and Elrohir swallowed. A purpose? As in taking up duties of some kind? Despite the chill wind, a cold sweat broke out on his brow. "I have no interest in life at court. I know Adar and Naneth wish us to accept the king's offer, but…"

"He is not just the king, Elrohir. He is family. And it would give us a change of scenery, at least. We might make new friends…"

But Elrohir was already shaking his head. He had heard all the arguments before, and he had no wish to follow Elladan to Tirion.

"Friends? Among the Noldor?" He spat into the dirt beside him. "They see us as little more than dogs." He sensed rather than saw Elladan stiffen, but continued on, his ire roused. "Family the Noldóran may be, but I shall never be happy or at peace in walls of stone! Nor shall I abase myself by giving those peacocks the satisfaction of laughing in my face when I trip all over the proper way of doing things."

He sucked in a breath, feeling a need to hit something at the very suggestion. How many times had his father and mother urged him and Elladan to go to Tirion? Suggested there they might find a 'purpose' in life. As if he needed a purpose other than just living! "I do not belong there," he added, though whether Elladan heard him above the wind, he did not know.

His breathing came in heavy gusts, and he spun away when Elladan's hand squeezed his shoulder. His sudden motion caused the loose soil at the edge to shift and, for a moment, the world spun and he felt for certain he would fall from the cliff face onto the sea-pounded rocks below. For a moment…he wished he would. His fingers clenched his stone tightly in his fist as the sound of the surf below seemed to fill his ears.

Strong hands dragged him back from the edge, then shook him for his foolishness. "Are you insane? Are you courting death?" Elladan was furious and rightly so, Elrohir thought with chagrin. Their hair whipped about them, blending together as Elladan glared into his face. "If death is what you wished, why did you choose this life? You could have stayed in Ennor and joined Estel and Arwen." His brother's voice broke, and Elrohir found himself suddenly released as Elladan swung around and headed back down the path towards where they had left their horses.

Some things could not yet be discussed, not even between the two of them. Elrohir watched his brother go, pain radiating from the area of his heart. With no more orcs to seek out, no more wars to fight, he and his brother's disparate interests were brought to clear sight. He blinked at a sudden stinging sensation in his eyes. He had forgotten that. In the years they had banded together to seek revenge on the orcs that had so wounded their mother, they had both forgotten how dissimilar they were.

Elrohir knew now without any doubts that their lives would go in vastly different directions. He closed his eyes against the pain of the coming separation. Elladan would go to Tirion, eventually – and he? Well, he would also have to find some purpose in this life here on Tol Eressëa.

He followed Elladan down the path and mounted. They did not speak as they rode the hour back to Bereden. Elrohir kept his eyes straight ahead, barely noting the fact that spring had arrived in the new green leaves and bright flowers dotting the sides of the path.

Upon their return, Elrohir went straight to his rooms and began to plan. His heart did not lie west on the mainland in Tirion. He was instead drawn to the wide open spaces, amid the green vales and forested slopes, or perhaps even the sweeping beaches. He pulled out his much worn pack and a couple changes of clothing that he had worn in Ennor that he had brought with him to Tol Eressea. He needed to discover what life he could make for himself here, and that would require his getting out there and discovering the land and the people and trying his hand at various occupations. Elrohir knew his family would not be pleased with his course, but in the end, he prevailed.

Within a fortnight, he set out to travel the land he now called home, leaving behind his concerned parents and his agitated twin. It was long past time for him to make his way in life unassisted by any other.

He hoisted his pack and set out on foot, keeping his eyes on the horizon, while his fingers toyed with the ever-present, plain grey stone.


To Be Continued…

Author's notes: I don't often write stories set in Aman, so I'm including some notes for those readers who are unfamiliar with the places in Aman and kin to the twins as well as some elvish terminology.

Epessë - a name given by another, usually due to personality, some distinguishing feature or talent or some happening in an elf's life.

Dúruth – Sindarin. 'Sombre anger'. Elrohir's epessë

Candruth – Sindarin. 'Bold anger'. Elladan's epessë

These names are used by the twins only in reference to each other and only in private. They were given to each other by the other after the attack on Celebrían and during the time they began to hunt orcs with a vengeance.

Adar – Sindarin. 'father'

Avalonnë – large port on the eastern side of Tol Eressëa.

Bereden –home of Elrond and Celebrían, a couple hours ride north from Avalonnë and about an hour inland from the Sea Cliffs where this chapter takes place.

Daernaneth – Sindarin. 'great mother'. Accepted in fanon as the term for Grandmother.

Ennor – Sindarin name for Middle-earth.

Naneth – Sindarin. 'mother'

Noldóran – Arafinwë, King of the Noldor, father of Galadriel and great-grandfather to the sons of Elrond.

Tirion – Primary city of the Noldor on the mainland of Valinor. Home of Arafinwë's court.

Tol Eressëa – an island off the mainland of Valinor.