The Rohirric Job

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Title: The Rohirric Job (#2454)
Author: SpaceWeavil
Chapters: 1

Archive: Tolkien
Category: Alternate Universe (AU)
Description: For the OSA drabble challenge #40 - Tolkien Done Modern. (100 word fic) Slightly inspired by recent forum discussions, this is a different take on Saruman's plans for Helm's Deep (based more on the movie than the book).
Published: 18 Dec 2005
Updated: 18 Dec 2005
Warnings:
Type: Humour
Characters: Saruman; Grima; Uruk-Hai

Chapter 1 - 1

A/N - This is for the OSA drabble challenge #40, 'Tolkien Done Modern', which involved taking a scene from Tolkien and rewriting it in the style of something modern. I've kind of stretched this a bit, for the sake of trying to get a cheap laugh. Please forgive me.

Five�

The Uruk-hai set an iron cauldron beside some boulders and a set of gates, mimicking Helm�s Deep�s defences.

Four�

The Uruk-Hai then raised its torch, looking towards Saruman for instruction.

Three�

Gr�ma shuffled closer to his master, gazing at their practice target.

Two�

Saruman gave a subtle nod.

One�

The Uruk-hai dropped the torch. A loud bang rocked the walls of Isengard. As the smoke cleared, all that remained of the Uruk and the model was a pile of steaming ash.

Saruman sighed and glowered at his orc lieutenant.

�You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!�
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