Reviews for "Storm Warning"

Thu Jul 24, 2003 1:21 pm

Savage people! Elronds ankles need to be braced if he's ever going to walk again. Estel is extremely cute. Are they going to be given a break? You're story allows readers to feel emotions ( I hope it's not just me), that's a sign of a good writer. It is a great story but you should watch your conventions. A lot of your grammar is out of place. You should also try to stick to either past or present tense. Other than that it's a great story.

Thu Jul 24, 2003 4:28 pm

Silreth said
> Savage people! Elronds ankles need to be braced if he's ever going to walk again. Estel is extremely cute. Are they going to be given a break? You're story allows readers to feel emotions ( I hope it's not just me), that's a sign of a good writer. It is a great story but you should watch your conventions. A lot of your grammar is out of place. You should also try to stick to either past or present tense. Other than that it's a great story.

Glad I got my emotions going across, thank you for the two points I need to watch out for. I'm used to writing present tense and not past tense so at times I do forget. As for my grammer. -_- I hate to say it, but grammer is one thing I have yet to learn and keep in my mind.

I hope you coninue to read my story, torturing readers is what I love to do, even if it takes some time to prick there emotions... Just wait for what's planned next story ::cackles evily:: Twisted Evil smiley face

Fri Jul 25, 2003 7:05 pm

Next story? Can't wait! I just finished this one. It's really good. The last chapter is very touching. I'm glad it was a happy ending.

Fri Apr 02, 2004 4:19 pm

Chapter 6 is a bit graphic, don't you think? You need to give it a hard R rating because of that, especially since it's a little three year old boy that's being beaten half to death. *shudders* I almost stopped reading right there, but I kept on because I want to see these bad guys come to a very fitting end! Grrrr They're EVIL!!!

*moving on the chapter 7 now*

I finished reading the whole thing and am glad to see that Elrond, Estel and Figwitt were all rescued, but still think the bad guys got off too easy. I like it that Vic seemed to have a last minute change of heart, but that Bono guy REALLY should have suffered more! Grrr I can see him being wounded, severely burned and surviving only to become the town freak, tormented by rotten kids for the rest of his life and unable to do a thing about it. Yeah, THAT'S what I wanted for him! *nodding emphatically*

In places your story was a tad contradictory, but on the whole it was good. Thank you for sharing it with us. Smile smiley face

Sun May 30, 2004 11:19 am

So far I am enjoying this angst fest. I like how each member of the family has bonded. Elrond's worry is evident when Estel is missing. I love the humor, brothers often do 'mean' stuff to one another. Good descriptions in the fight scenes. Often, the protagonist takes alot of injury and just shruggs it off. Not the case here! Good call.

However, I do find a few errors that a beta could have picked out. (Not grammar, just wrong word usage: example too =also/very verses to=towards a direction) I don't point these out to be a pain or anything. I can easily live with the errors. (However, I am a teacher.) Just some people get turned off by this sort of thing. I really am not trying to be an evil witch. Just giving you a heads up Wink smiley face

Thank you for all of your hard work thus far, Minna sedh

Hisie Lome

Sun May 30, 2004 11:41 am

Good chapter. It is plainly evil to hit a kid because of their upbringing.....but, villians are supposed to be evil anyways. It was nice to see that some humans have compassion. Perhaps, with out her help the elf lord would have faded.

Sun May 30, 2004 12:10 pm

Thanks for a "fun" ride! I really enjoyed the closing remarks about how each person leaves something in our lives.

Minna Sedh, Hisie Lome

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Reviews for "Storm Warning"