Reviews for "Hunting Lessons"

Wed Dec 22, 2004 3:50 pm

There are a few dangles, like "Small for his age, particularly for one of the line of Númenor, the dagger hung...," but nothing a grammar-minded beta couldn't fix in a snap. In the opening sequence, are the two principal characters Boromir and Faramir? I assumed so, based on clues, but it couldn't hurt to mention names. Makes reading a little easier. Smile smiley face

The interaction between them, and the care Boromir both thinks and shows for his little brother is very touching. Be on the lookout for pronoun confusion (which could be helped by inserting names here and there). For instance, I had to read this sentence twice to make sure I knew who was who: "The big one, the leader, the most dangerous- he was his." The details struck me as particularly well-thought-out, as in "the blade’s sheen dulled with acid so as not to betray him by either sunlight or moonlight." Nice, and how gutsy of youto write the action from the Southron's point-of-view. Interesting and fresh. I'm confused by this, though: "Orc by day, men by night- the rangers knew well how to hunt their prey." Are they shapeshifters? Or do you mean that the rangers hunt orcs by day and men by night? Despite my confusion in some parts (which could just be my lack of caffeine showing!), I thought the language was artful and the story itself intriguing so far.

Mon Jan 03, 2005 11:00 am

I thought this a fabulous piece, so rich with detail and character. To give you a more detailed review would be to author something longer than the story itself!

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Reviews for "Hunting Lessons"