Reviews for "Boats to Build"

Thu Oct 27, 2005 10:24 am

I was impressed with the descriptions as he walked down the beach. Like reading something from one of the old masters, what you wrote added as much to the atmosphere as much as the setting. I really got the feel of being on a beach, it brought back some nice memories.

I like your Numenorean (in the Elros kind of way) take on Adrahil stepping down while he was still in sound mind and body, retiring as it were. And him showing Borimir the nobility in hard work and actually creating something. The part about the sword was profound.

I wish I had memories like this from my grandfather, not that I have bad ones, I just wasn't old enough to appreciate him, until now.

Thu Oct 27, 2005 10:53 am

I agree with Inglor about the atmosphere of the story being very well written. Very rich details set the scene without dragging down the story. I particularly liked your close attention to details such as when he first closed his eyes in the sun and saw a mass of color before black. Thats something we all see but most people wouldn't think about it that much to include it in a story.

Boromir was, as always, very true to what I imagine Boromir to have been. Arrogant at first, yet once he understood, more willing to accept that he may not know everything. I particularly liked his grandfather. Very wise.

This touched me on a more personal level because I never knew my grandfather or my greatfather on my dad's side who both grew up in a fishing village in New England. Plus my father used to work the summers down at the docks. Growing up middle class suburbia with my father being a business man who traveled and wore a suit, it was kind of hard for me to imagine him living the lifestyle in which he grew up. It would have been nice to get a glimpse into that world before he died but I didn't actually get to until we took his ashes to be scattered in the ocean there. Too late I developed an appreciation for his childhood home by the sea and regret I was not able to ask him more questions about life there.

Thanks for sharing this.

Thu Oct 27, 2005 3:15 pm

Oh wow Nance. This is written like your drabbles. Every word so concise and well thought out. There is not a sentence in this entire story wasted. This piece embodies all the elements of a well written drabble in that each word is so well utilized that there is not longer room for omission without loosing either coherence or depth or both. This is just the most difficult to produce, easiest to read sort of writing there is. I was in a hurry and haven't taken the time to enjoy a damn thing all morning and this just set my mood on its butt. I read, re-read and then went over your notes while digesting this fantastic bit of technical genius.

Now, on to the actual story, which is what truly blows me away about your writing. You have managed to say so much here that gave me chills, made me cry (literally, even now its making me tear up) for Denethor, Boromir and Faramir over stuff that hasn't even come close to happening yet, though there is a sense that his mother is unhappy by this time. Through his grandfather, you give a foreboding that is just gut wrenching and as soon as it dawned on me, this whole tale changed in my mind. But even without that element, it is so touching and sad and frustrating. When one gets to the age, or rather one's children, regardless of your own age, get to that point where they begin to reverse the rolls on you, it is so hard not to just knock them down a peg or two rather then allow them to take the natural progression of growing into the roll that they will assume. This amazing, wonderful man has lovingly given over all that he was, all that he knew, his entire life into the hands of his son and found something to fill the void. Most wonderful for him, something that he could live with, and that made him happy. For this monumental act of love he is being patronized as nearly feeble minded. I certainly hope Imrahil was wise enough to see the enormity of his father's sacrifice. On top of that, the grace with which he honors the craftsman, the beauty of his analogies, just. gawd Nance, I'm so blown away by this piece I'm starting to sound like an idiot. Can I just say, kudos, kewl fic? Dammit, I thought I had all I wanted to say worked out, but I feel like a babbling fool. Just read people.

Thu Oct 27, 2005 10:23 pm

I had to come back and add this. The layers of Boromir for such a young kid and the arrogance and that 14 year old, 'you have nothing to teach me cuz I know it all,' and the thumbing his nose at anyone he perceives to be of lesser value than himself. He doesn't see past his own nose. But there is something about his innocence that shines through loud and clear making disliking him out of the question. He seemes to be simply mimicking what he perceives to be his "feelings" about the world around him and to me it seems as though he is not terribly convinced that he is right to feel this way. There is an element of the childish role playing in his telling himself he has come to restore the prince that is charming. Just wanted you to know that I did see Boromir and the intricate way you constructed his character as well. I came back to add this cuz I just didn't want you to think that it didn't come through. I was just a bit dumfounded the first time.

Fri Oct 28, 2005 9:37 am

Well, as if I could possibly topped what's been said. I can just agree wholeheartedly with the attention to detail. As Ghetto said, not a word wasted and yet no description left lacking! So much depth in so short a space. A delight to read. I really felt like I was sitting on the beach with them. All of you people in this story are so "real". Not just the main characters, but the minor ones merely mentioned are given depth by what is revealed about them. Bravo!

Mon Nov 07, 2005 4:06 pm

Nancy, this is lovely. I especially enjoyed the emotion of the thought of making something with your own hands. Kudos to your grandfather for giving you these memories. I'm glad you shared them with us.

Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:32 pm

I'm as impressed as ever by your work, particularly the patience of the older man when dealing with his cocky grandson. This is one of those pieces I've read, and there haven't been many, when I could quite literally smell the sea air and feel the wood and tools in my hands. The description was lovely. What I enjoyed more, though, was the portrayal of Boromir as a boy and how easy it is to see this young man turning into the warrior from the books. The contrast between the patient old man tired of duties and courtly necessity and the grandson eager and excited about growing up was equally drawing; a great bit of the 'how' Boromir grew up. Thank you for it.

Thu Sep 21, 2006 7:57 am

Okay a bit later than I intended too, but this is simply stunning Nancy! First, I love the narrative in this story. When I read this, you take me to the beach, made me feel as I was walking in the sand, the gulls crying, and the waves gently lapping as if I am just having a day out to the beach. But besides this, secondly, I do admire the characterisations in this piece. Boromir, used to his daily life in Minas Tirith comes across a young arrogant and cocky boy who thinks he knows everything (in that respect he is incredibly well written as a teen), but is basically just mimicking everything he saw and witnessed in his life. Yet as a reader, I feel for him, while his grandfather observes him and relates to his grandson how his own father had to pick up the responsibilities before his own time was there. The way Adrahil relates that was just so grandly written, I could simply imagine that happen in this piece (oww wouldn’t this be a nice plotbunny?). Somehow Boromir clings on to the memory of his grandfather the way he sees his own father, but yet he cannot comprehend that a leader will never earn the respect of all, if he is willing to lower themselves to that ‘level’ too. To me it is clear that Boromir still has so much to learn before he would be able to lead and govern his own men. What I really liked was the question of the sword. Boromir starts to relate the facts of where it comes from ect ect, but Adrahil manages to break through the thinking pattern of his grandson and makes him wonder what it will take to be able to make something with your own hands. Secretly I am wishing now that you will write this too… I would love to see how Boromir discovers this (or anything he learns to master, made with his own hands).

And as a third, I love the sketch of the Dol Amroth seamen culture you sketched for us here Nancy. I loved the portrayal of those men sitting there, working on their nets looking down on Boromir for a change and thusly setting their own rules. This piece really felt free of the setting of Minas Tirith and took us as a reader to the Dol Amroth way of life and culture. This is such a treat to read, thanks so much for writing this!

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Reviews for "Boats to Build"