Reviews for "Another Man's Cage"

Fri Jul 28, 2006 3:15 pm

I was just thinking the other day that no one really writes Silm fic that centers on Feanor and his family unless it is all about how horrible they were. And poor Nerdanel hardly ever gets a passing glance. I'm so excited to see a fic that delves into Feanor's family life, especially his sons and their respective childhoods. I can't wait to see how this all turns out. My only criticism, which isn't really a criticism, more of a suggestion is that you include name equivilants/translations in your Author's Notes, or at the end of the chapter. At first I had to keep reciting all of Feanor's sons names in my head in order of their birth so I could puzzle out who was talking and who was being referred to.

Anyway, I really enjoyed this and I'm definitely looking forward to future installments. I like how you've set up the relationships between the brothers, as I think their relationships with each other are absolutely essential to understanding why they did what they did later in life. Great job Very Happy smiley face

Fri Jul 28, 2006 5:22 pm

Oh Dawn!!! You know I read this story entirely, but even now, when I see this chapter being posted, my hearts jumps to see Tyelkormo. And as I told you, I am going to read this one again. I fully remember now why I this chapter is still so vivid in my memory. I have a couple of questions regarding punctuation though, but I'll PM you. It might be me Wink smiley face

When I read this chapter what immediately captivates me is the scenery, atmosphere, a young Celegorm lying on his back, watching the skies and perceiving nature & Arda as it is. I cannot help to think what happened to Celegorm that made him the dauntless warrior he became later on. But right now... this emanates peace, bliss of living on Aman under the lights of the trees.

Oh and this foreshadowing bit: The blessing is ours, says Nelyo, and he is right: Never are we alone, not in joy and not in sadness.

I like the way you try to capture the speed of Celegorm's thoughts... boy he has so many associations, thoughts that crosses others.. simply amazing!

The wings of the house link into each other and back into themselves like one of the puzzles that Nelyo will give Carnistir and I to do when he wants to keep us out of the way—puzzles that we have determined are impossible to solve—wings enclosing courtyards and gardens and fountains, rooms leading into rooms or opening upon hallways that convolute along the length of the house, leading to honeycombed clusters of yet more rooms with stairs leading up or down into secret places that can be accessed nowhere else: small secret coves or else long, winding stairs that end atop towers where I can lean upon my belly upon the railing—arms spread wide and feet treading only air—and pretend that I swim among the stars, until I hear feet upon the stairs and a voice calling me to chores or supper, and my feet are wrenched back to the ground.

Okay breathe Turko, breathe Wink smiley face

What a beautiful scene, I can picture it so clearly.

I love this bit!

And me, with my hair the color of honey and enough blue in my eyes that I was often mistaken for a Vanya when I walked in Tirion. At times, I complain of my blue eyes, which set me apart from the rest of my family, and Atar soothes me by saying, “That’s because I was looking up at the blue, blue sky when I begot you,” and Amil blushes and nudges him in the arm, Nelyo grins, and Macalaurë looks vaguely uncomfortable.

Just amazing Dawn. I like the style you give him, this voice suits him very well. I can't believe that I am getting bouncy at the thought of re-reading this story again! So thanks for posting it here! You rock smiley face

Fri Aug 04, 2006 8:16 am

I love it! Celegorm and Caranthir are adorable. There's nothing cuter than little kids wearing capes a la Superman. I loved the scene in the washroom with Caranthir trying eat the tie from Maglor's shirt. And Celegorm's reaction to Meadhros' love interest was priceless. I also really enjoyed Feanor's and Nerdanel's interaction with their children and with each other. They obviously love their children and each other. I can't wait to see how this progresses.

Fri Aug 04, 2006 4:10 pm

Owww, there is so much family dynamics in there. Where can I sign up to help the guys cooking dinner the next time? I just love little Caranthir and Feanor together. Actually every interaction feels so free from the darkness we get from the Silmarillion: simply the warm fuzzies!

Ow and Dawn:

Macalaurë is dressed in a white tunic and loose gray trousers, barefoot, with his hair unrestrained, but Nelyo is a mess. Summer is imminent, and the library is sweltering. (Had I awakened, freezing, just a short while ago? It seems doubtful now.) Nelyo’s clothes are bedraggled; he’s shed all but a short-sleeved tunic unlaced to mid-chest and a pair of breeches rolled off his ankles

simply *guh* Drool Bucket smiley face

what an image. Yum!

Fri Aug 11, 2006 5:47 pm

Another beautiful chapter Dawn! I am enjoying this re-read a lot. Oh y I had to laugh so hard while I read this chapter, from a serious dinner gathering, to chaos to joy, tenderness and a confused Tyelko who is so hurt on what he founds out.

What a visual do you give me here Dawn... Just amazing. Very Happy smiley face

Carnistir takes a big spoonful of mashed peas and catapults them into the side of Atar’s face, where they stick in his hair and make him flinch in surprise.

“…and so if you reverse the magnets, then—” Nelyo is saying when he is hit by flecks of mashed peas that had missed hitting Atar and flown past to hit him.

And Macalaurë's calm reaction...

Macalaurë calmly chews his sweet potatoes, reaches for his glass in front of my plate, and takes a long swig of wine.

I really would have like to be there at that moment!

Awww and little Tyelko, trying so hard to do his utter best for his father, wishing to show him that he is ready for the forge too.

“I wish only to do right by you, to be a worthy teacher, and to rush forward now would not be for the best. Do you understand?”

“Yes.” I swallow, make my voice brave. “I do.” I meet his eyes and know that I will never exceed him. I will try—oh, I will try—but never will I exceed him.

He says no more, and his hand lingers on my face for a moment, then lifts, leaving my skin chilled. I shiver, not because the water is cold, but because I am bereft. He does not notice; he is gazing at the floor again.

This is such an incredibly insight in Celegorm's character and the foreshadowing of his life and fate... simply amazing!

This is such a great story and well, I know there are so many chapters to come. Thanks for posting this chapter Dawn, I loved it!

Fri Aug 25, 2006 10:52 am

It's Friday and I have two chapters to read! Yay! This time both chapters are written from Carnistir's point of view. There are so many parts that I liked in this chapter that either made me laugh, moved & touched me so deeply, that I just leave it with impressions this time... Wink smiley face

I love the way you write the children's reaction and perception of Finwë. And as an icing on the cake how Feanor so deeply loves his own father. With these two chapters you showed us how deep Feanor's wound is regarding the loss of his mother and how he tries to deal with it the best way he possibly can, but it still cuts him deeply. Carnistir and food will always make me laugh. Children's perception of food are so true, I mean I even still don't like wine and I had to chuckle when I read Carnistir's description of wine. It is also a delight to see how Carnistir describes his brothers, their interactions and oh so deep love they have for each other. The moment when you wrote about how all four tried to deal with their parents fight. In wel chosen words and excellent descriptions and portrayal of emotions you give us the image on how all four try to console each other. Nelyo's cry in thoughts I wish I was not the oldest.

But then, so pure and simply, you write about the pain, the lovemaking of Feanor and Nerdanel: how they match each other and simply are made for each other.. How he can confide in his love and how she tries to soothe his pain... so incredibly moving.

There is so much more I loved about these two chapters, I think I can continue for quite some more pages (and I am certain you don't mind), but I want to thank you for sharing these two fabulous chapters with us.

You rock smiley face

I am looking forward to next week!

Fri Sep 01, 2006 3:33 pm

*sighs happily* Chapter 6 already! Just like Maedhros, your stories read so fluently that I sometimes forget that we are only in the beginning of the story and this time it is from Maedhros' perspective. Yay! There is so much I loved about this chapter. Where shall I begin? *thinks*

Maedhros musing on time compared with the energetic Celegorm a few chapters before is very striking. Where the young Tyelko cannot wait for the next day to begin, Maedhros is really close to coming of age with more rest in his soul.

Macalaurë likes to use big words when he is angry, as though they make less obvious the sheer childish satisfaction of pointless complaining.

Aww Maglor, I just felt that I should come to the rescue and escort him to a long and comfy bath.. Very Happy smiley face

Atar gets up early every day to care for the garden, and his diligence is obvious: The dirt is soft and dark, neatly turned; there is not a weed or yellowed leaf to be seen. Just like Atar. Meticulous. Perfect.

Hmmmm maybe Feanor should come over here and tend my jungle garden. Smile smiley face

(Macalaurë served a weeklong sentence washing dishes when he was little for swearing by Nienna’s tears after he dropped a piece of stone on his foot.) ROFL smiley face

*wipes away the tears from laughter* Hehehe

Okay, ahem. I like the build up on tension in this part... I can see those two sitting there like: okay we insulted the Valar, mother is very stern towards us about it.. and then this:
Atar came back a minute later and offered the bottle to us first before drinking of it himself; I was so nervous that the water only sat in my mouth; I couldn’t swallow it and might have eventually drowned on it, if Atar hadn’t said, “Those swears were pretty good, Macalaurë and Nelyo, but I know the two of you can do better.” He pushed the bottle back into my hands and went back to hammering on a carving knife that he was making for our mother.

Well the two lads didn't see that one coming!!

Oh and Tyelko!! He is so... awww. He is most certainly my favourite in your story and the way he interacts with Maedhros is just... awww. Not very eloquent huh. But the slamming into Nelyo's tree like legs, his anxiety to loose his eldes brother is just very touching. The moment where Feanor bestows his gifts on his sons is just marvellous and I hope they steal a lot of hearts during this gathering Smile smiley face

Another great chapter Dawn!

Sun Sep 10, 2006 9:46 am

Oh an update! What I loved about this wonderful chapter is to see Maglor through Maedhros eyes. Oh my, I giggled so hard when even during his great moment with Atawende, his mind is still worried where Maglor went off to.

Oh and this part: (Things get so confusing that I spend a few embarrassing bars dancing with Vorondil and find that he is remarkably light on his feet.) Oh my goodness Maedhros! LOL, such a great visual.

This is so incredibly beautiful: Our people celebrate the Mingling of the Lights and rejoice next in the burning radiance of Laurelin. But maybe because I was born in the depths of Telperion, I love most of all the hours that leave the land glazed with enough silver to take the fear from the night without obscuring the stars. How beautiful the sky in these hours! A black backdrop punctured by tiny pebbles of light and draped with hazy silver gauze. My grandfather awakened beneath those stars; he walked hand in hand beneath them with my grandmother Míriel, seeking the light of Valinor.

I love the mentioning of Míriel Smile smiley face

“Oh, Nelyo.” He blushes, and his hands scramble to pull the blankets over his head, as he always does when I embarrass him, forgetting that he shoved them away with his feet. “I didn’t exactly say that.”

“Macalaurë, that is why you are the musician and Atar is the craftsman and I am the loremaster.”

I really liked this mentioning of the different roles and professions all have within the family. Also, this is a great brotherly moment where shortly before I could have wacked Maedhros for treating his smitten brother so harshly. Yes, this is another great chapter Dawn, I love the way how you weave in so much things of which I recently read about in the History of Middle Earth. Love will most likely be hardly won for Maedhros, where his father and brother seem to find it so easily. I do wonder what happened with that elf-maiden incident... hmmm. Thanks for updating Dawn, it was worth the weekly wait.

Fri Sep 22, 2006 3:54 pm

Oh my goodness, two chapters full of Noldo politics and troubles within the family. I feel for Finarfin, being the youngest one, wishing to mend the family tension, but has accepted it. While I read chapter eight, I could not help to wonder the following: what would make a family royal and above others. It remains a very interesting question when you take a closer look at Fëanor who reminds his father of that. But then we have Indis, a woman who obviously loves the wealth and distinction she now can claim her own. Yes she was in love with Finwe for such a long time and yes, her story does prove that love will be answered, but the manner in which makes me wonder if rich clothes and the delicate approach to life, is the way to be truly loved by your people. Somehow, I can sense from the daily life of people that some really need to place a person on a pedestal, where others really appreciate the detail, and personal care (the girl with the oranges for example) a high prince is willing to share. Finarfin somehow has found a way in between, Fëanor would be a good leader of the 'normal' Noldor and soldiers, but I wonder what it will take Fingolfin to really earn the respect of his people. Chapter nine is really heartbreaking. Poor Fingon, I so feel for him. When I read or rather observed his behaviour through Maedhros eyes I could not help to wonder under what pressure and, yeah, threats this little one lives with in a palace. This particular line made me wonder about that:

Since then, I usually greeted him as he sat on his father’s knee or clutched his mother’s hand, a small, pale-faced child whose damp eyes reminded me of an animal who has been wounded and remains mistrustful.

Why would be a child this young already be so mistrustful? Does court intrigue also means involving the younger ones? Is Finrod being tried as an adult, watching his moves wherever he goes, weighing his words carefully? What happened with a carefree child? Yes, I think the parents are not understanding his needs.

And oh my! Gossip!!! Very Happy smiley face

“You are my cousin Russandol,” he says. “The one with all the maidens in Tirion.”

Hehehe. What a reputation!

Here is another part that makes me wonder about Fingolfin's and Ainaire's parenting skills:

“Atar, do not make me go,” Findekáno whimpers. “I promise I’ll learn better here. I promise.” He is clutching at Nolofinwë, and Nolofinwë is peeling his arms away. I have to stride away to the end of the stable, rubbing at my cheeks to hide the tears that have suddenly spilled from my eyes.

This really made me wonder what Fingolfin has tried to force his son to learn and study so hard. If he wouldn't, his big bad uncle would come to claim him and make his life even more miserable. I think Fëanor's observation was spot on and I get the impression that he will make sure of it that Finrod will get a taste of a loving & nurturing family life.

I wince in sympathy for poor Macalaurë, who has been forbidden many times to tell our little brothers scary stories about the Outer Lands. Carnistir has nightmares and Tyelkormo “gets ideas,” Atar says.

Oh I had to laugh so hard when Celegorm started to tell how King Olwë would become enraptured in an enchantment... great foreshadowing. Typically for him to play out his ideas like that. And ai poor Maglor.

But darn Dawn, this line made me cry:
I cannot see his eyes as he says, “I have nothing to be thankful for.”

Poor Finrod, it makes me wonder if he ever can become a child again.

Sun Oct 01, 2006 11:02 am

Let me see if I succeed in leaving a review without clicking too hasty on the X (well I could always blame Tyelko). This chapter stirred something inside me and it was a bit unsettling. Not regarding your writing, but call it a dawning on what is going on with Nerdanel - which is likely one of the seeds for later events.

It is an observation coming from her:

I know things at times through aching intuition. I know that my fifth child will be no more mine than the four I have now. Carnistir’s birth took too much out of me, and Fëanáro will be ready to conceive again before I am. My body will hold the child as a vessel holds water, but it will be Fëanáro who will be his true creator, for I will lack the energy for anything more ambitious than his physical nourishment.

I have carried a child under my heart and I know how much this child is mine, especially since I know him befor he was born. The fact that Nerdanel just sees her pregnancy as being a vessel and giving it physical nourishment, makes me wonder how things could have gone different if she had nourished all emotionally as well. But we know that Nerdanel gave some of her children that emotional bit too.. In Tolkien's world we know that during the year a child remains begotten, both father and mother can nourish the child emotionally, whereas the mother can only give physical nourishement (well duh!). This observation really made me sit back and ponder about this while thoughts go into several directions with the main thought... how much is Nerdanel to blame for the break up with Feanor and the rift that will be made between her and her sons... I am not saying here that Nerdanel does not love her sons (I mean, this clearly shows), but still.

There are more things that caught my attention, but before I write a review of more than a page (you know I can do that with ease): again a great chapter.

Okay one more thing then, this was so poignant: I should know, for Fëanáro used to act the same

Brilliant! Even the presence of a mother is no guarantee for happiness, there is so much more going on like that and Nerdanel sees that.

Oh and (ut oh), I just love this observation:
He sleeps like a doll tucked into bed: on his back, with his arms flat over the covers, his face turned to the ceiling. He doesn’t mutter or whine when I wake him—Tyelkormo tends to do both—but slides from bed and retrieves the traveling clothes that Nelyo had helped him to choose last night or Tyelkormo talks to butterflies and birds and foxes and claims that they answer him,

There is so much more that I loved! Yet another great chapter Dawn!

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Reviews for "Another Man's Cage"