Reviews for "Nobody's Hero"

Sun Apr 08, 2007 8:52 pm

Wow, Ginny comes of as a cold bitch in this piece. I kind of like it, though it makes me sad. I suppose that's what war can do to a kid.

Much as I enjoyed this little read, though, it was not without hiccoughs. A good proofread would quickly uncover oopses that really hinder the readability of the story (such as major verb tense inconsistencies, and things like "She had prepared my own little speech" Wink smiley face

.

"Cracks in the concrete..." -- You really need some quotation marks here to show that her speech is beginning. I thought this transition was really confusing.

Best luck!

Tue Oct 27, 2009 7:46 pm

While a nice concept, I find the reading hindered by the verb tenses. They jump back and forth too often and upsets the equilibrium while trying to figure it if is then or now. And, if Harry is dead, then this can hardly be Bookverse and should be A/U. Just my thoughts on the subject.

Thank you for sharing.

rous

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Reviews for "Nobody's Hero"