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Reviews for "To Remember"

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AuthorReview
Viv

Joined: 25 Apr 2003
Reviews: 673
Location: Texas
Tue Jun 01, 2004 7:38 pm
I sense that something powerful is going on in this story, but I can't quite reach it. Maybe the language problems are keeping it hidden. Have you considered proofreading, or maybe having someone else proofread the story? Setting and tense were especially confusing. Some of the word choices were just lovely, but it's hard to get the full impact of this story in its present form. I hope you'll consider revising it.
 
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Monaleoht
Joined: 02 Mar 2004
Reviews: 352
Location: I travel with the wind, as free as an eagle soaring the great firmament above Arda
Wed Jun 02, 2004 10:52 am
It's interesting.. though extremely confusing! I hope you'll rewrite it soon - it's a great story.. just absolutely confusing! Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face Very Happy smiley face
 
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SilverMoonLady

Joined: 14 Jul 2003
Reviews: 251
Location: Breaking in a Brandybuck... *wicked grin*
Thu Jun 03, 2004 12:44 pm
Very interesting idea, that more than friendship might have grown between these two; I can tell there is a great deal of feeling (from you and them) in this. Can't wait to see more.
 
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