The Unlikely Visitor

Chapter 17.
In which evil is discussed, and Sauron comes to understand a couple very important things.

He had eaten Ginny’s sandwiches, all thirty of them. Then he had played a game of wizard chess with her, avoided Precious Nibelungen, made a drawing of the Morannon, and generally felt ashamed for acting as he had done. Perhaps it was no surprise he had never managed to conquer Middle-Earth, if this was how he responded to a simple infatuation… He had considered Ginny silly and stupid for wanting to talk about and fawn over her love interest, but in retrospect the way he had acted was far sillier and stupider. Thankfully Ginny had the maturity –which surprised him still- not to mock him for it. The day had passed far too quickly to his liking, and now he was standing at the door of the Astronomy Tower, wringing his hands. He had commanded armies. He had brought about the downfall of whole kingdoms. He had singlehandedly killed thousands. And yet he almost couldn’t find the courage to open the damn door. When he eventually did, his heart was beating in his throat. He wanted to walk to the platform, but it wasn’t necessary. He had just turned when a bright voice sounded behind him.
“Sauron…”
Sinistra. She just wore her usual golden brown velvet robes, but in Sauron’s mind she looked more impressive than ever. He wanted to say something, but his tongue wouldn’t obey him. The astronomy professor beat him to it.
“You are troubled still.”
“I… I am.”
She came closer and smiled caringly.
“What troubles you?”
He couldn’t tell her. He couldn’t, for the words were stuck somewhere between his mind and his mouth. Eventually, he sighed.
“Have you ever seen evil, Sinistra?”
The dark woman looked at him, her obsidian eyes suddenly filled with sorrow. She stepped away and opened the door to the platform.
“Come.”
He followed her outside, and was met with a dark sky. Clouded with blackness. No doubt his foul mood had something to do with that… Sinistra didn’t look at him when she spoke.
“I have seen evil, Sauron. Or at least, I have seen what passes for it. In my homeland, people fight a lot. There is always war somewhere, with someone.” She turned and sent him a sad smile. “You know, to the people here all black men and women look alike. To them we are one people under the common denominator of our skin. Africans. But to us… We are divided in tribes and families, and we fight among each other, brutally killing our own. Kinslaying for the stupidest reasons first. My village wasn’t spared either.” She shook her head. “People here worry about a wizarding war, they think those death-eaters are the worst criminals possible. And maybe they are, in a way. Madmen following a bigger madman, on a quest that is doomed to fail… People can detach themselves from that and call them monsters. But I have seen different evil. People, just people like me, leaving home to kill other people just like me.”
Sinistra stared at the sky, where no stars could be seen thanks to the thick clouds.
“Evil is such a relative thing. It is in all of us, fundamentally a part of the world, incarnate in everything. We can all become merciless. I have seen my family, even my father who was a foreigner and one of the kindest people I know, kill others in defense of the village.”
“But…”
“And then later our people would attack themselves, retaliate on the enemy. They did whatever was necessary for what they believed in, and in that way they were no different from the insane death eaters. Evil has reasons.”
Sauron was struck by memories, again. Suddenly curious, he inquired,
“Have you ever…”
The Astronomy professor nodded.
“I was 15, and it was right before my Thwasa, although I didn’t know that then. The village was under attack, and men of an enemy tribe had entered. One tried to rape me, and when he pushed me down and tried to force himself on me, I disemboweled him with the knife I held on my belt. It was instinctual and I have never regretted it.”
Sauron tried to picture it, and startled at the instinctive hatred he suddenly felt towards that unknown man. Sinistra approached him and took his clenched hand in hers. It only served to tense him up more…
“I know you come from a time and place of war, Sauron. I know you have committed evil, greater evil maybe than I can ever understand. But evil has reasons, and the Ancestors don’t lie.”
“I… I don’t understand it.”
It sounded pathetic, but Sauron couldn’t find anything else to say. That happened to him a frightening lot lately…
“The Ancestors who told me of the foreign spirit I had to find also gave me the means to recognize him. I don’t have the words to describe it properly, I’m afraid. They acquainted me with you, let me know you so I would know when I found you.” She smiled and softly stroked his hand. “So I know you, Sauron. Better than I know anyone else. I know your soul.”
Sauron stared at her, trying to comprehend what she had told him. He was still trying to comprehend it when she lent forward and pressed her lips on his. That was the point where he gave up on comprehending and just followed the instinctual urge to wrap his arms around her and deepen the kiss.
They kissed, and despite the cold night air their hands travelled and got rid of robes and other coverage, desperate to make more skin contact. The feeling was ecstatic and burning, both terrifying and wonderful, and it swept him away completely. Whatever was left protesting in his mind -reminding him that she was mortal, that he was the Dark Lord, and that this was not how he did things- faded into the feeling. Dark met with pale white, limbs entangled, and in a daze Sauron realized he now finally understood the difference between copulating and making love… then all relatively rational thoughts disappeared completely into the longing of two bodies, two souls, to be as close together as possible. They clawed at and wrestled with each other, bit, licked and kissed any piece of exposed skin… The wind carried their screaming and moaning to the ground, but there was no one to hear it.
Sauron had lost awareness of time and space, the concepts had simply ceased to exist within the boundaries of what he could perceive... and everything he felt he felt with the whole of his fëa. It burned, scoured him by means of fire, but the pain was a pleasure like he had never known before. When at long last their bodies were exhausted, their minds succumbed to a blissful sleep. Right before he surrendered to oblivion, Sauron realized he could see the stars. The clouds had cleared…

The next morning, he woke up to a soft touch. Someone was slowly caressing his hair. He opened his eyes and saw Sinistra; her lean dark body sprawled seductively over their discarded robes and her black hair hanging unrestrained over her shoulders. She let her hand run through his black tresses and smiled, her face lit up in the soft morning light.
It took him a while to understand where he was; his mind was languid and slow, and for a couple moments his thoughts were narrowed down to just the pleasant touches. When understanding broke through his contented haze, he still barely believed it, barely believed that the night before had actually happened. That this beautiful creature loved him… it was more than he could process at the time. His head was fuzzy, and he felt a smile creep on his lips as he watched his lover. A real smile, without a trace of malice of mockery. How long had it been that he had last felt like this? It must have been thousands of years… Sinistra crawled closer to him, and he suppressed a moan when he felt her soft skin against his again. The strange magic was still there, even stronger now it seemed… She had a slightly mischievous look in her eyes when she kissed him, and Sauron had no choice to give in to the urge again. Needless to say he didn’t make it to classes that day…

Ginny met Sauron again after Potions class, and the moment she laid eyes on him she couldn’t stop herself from grinning. The Maia looked… different. He was still his imposing, intimidating self of course, and the air of doom and danger surrounding him was there as well… but something had changed. He seemed… radiant, almost. Which was a rather strange thing to see, considering that Sauron was a really dark being. Ginny didn’t think she had ever before perceived him as happy, but that was the unmistakable conclusion. Sauron Gorthaur was, doom and darkness aside, absolutely happy.
“I take it your conversation with Sinistra went well?”
He seemed almost confused when she said that.
“How would you know?”
Her grin widened.
“You’re kind of glowing.”
He skeptically raised an eyebrow.
“Glowing?”
“Metaphorically.”
Sauron didn’t like that he was so… obvious. His ability to deceive was greatly based on being able to hide his true feelings, after all. Despite that, he only mildly frowned at Ginny. Warningly he remarked,
“It would be wise not to mock me.”
“Sure, I’m just happy for you. I have class now, so… hon-lat!” (See you!)
He watched the young redhead skip away, and decided to retreat to his own rooms. Now the pleasant befuddlement of his mind was starting to wear off, he realized there was a lot that had changed, and a lot he would have to rethink and re-strategize for…

There were many concerns. Sauron could remember only one other occasion of “cross-species” Maiar coupling, and that had been with one of the Eldar… and what trouble that pair had given him! He grumbled for a moment at the memory of Luthien. Sinistra however… he had learned that this species named Wizards commonly lived to see a hundred, sometimes even a hundred fifty, but that that was it. She was mortal and would pass beyond the circles of the world when she died. The thought of that made his chest constrict. He couldn’t, wouldn’t let that happen. He knew magic that could lengthen a mortal life almost indefinitely, not for nothing had he once been called the Necromancer. Death held no secrets from him. Námo would never get her in his greedy hands if it depended on him… The knowledge that Sinistra’s mortality was not his largest issue at hand somewhat comforted him.
Sometimes Sauron still thought about the Valar and his punishment, but by now he was convinced that he had truly escaped them. He couldn’t imagine them wanting him to have even a speck of happiness, let alone the bliss he felt whenever he thought about the dark-skinned astronomer. The only possible conclusion was that he was free at last… His brief encounter with Irmo in the Gardens of Lòrien had been unsettling and hard to place in that context, but it had been a one-time event he could easily reason away as overactive imagination. After all, it was very unlikely that even his mind could visit Valinor without being detained and chastised.
No matter how great his suspected freedom was, it also brought other issues with it. Since he would probably never return to Middle-Earth, he would have to make himself a living in this world. Completing his education wouldn’t be too much of an issue, he had already reached what they called NEWT level for a great deal of his courses… but then what? No matter how much he loved Sinistra, he didn’t think he could spend the rest of his immortal life doing the things they taught him here. This world’s magic was fascinating, useful and occasion entertaining, but he missed doing what he had loved back on Arda. Knowledge was power and therefor he never objected to acquiring more of it, but that wasn’t where his heart lay. He was a smith, a strategist and a warrior; he was at his best when working in a forge, or planning for and engaging in combat. Making things as well as destroying them… perhaps a strange combination? Either way, Sauron knew by now that in this world there was little need for swords, daggers and armor, and he still felt a certain reserve against jewelry crafting. As for strategy, he had amused himself with meddling in Ginny’s love life, but he could hardly make a career out of gossip mongering and insinuating, could he? Despite all he had learned in a short time, he still knew far too little of this world to make any plans or decisions, and lack of a plan never failed to unsettle him… He wanted to give Sinistra an empire,

The Second Task of the famed triwizard tournament had passed without Sauron paying it much heed; he had been elsewhere with his mind. All he knew about it stemmed from Ginny’s overly verbose explanations of her love interest’s deeds, which he mostly tuned out of in the middle. The little redhead was, next to Sinistra, the only constant in his life, and annoying as she was, Sauron found he wouldn’t want to miss her. She had been pranked quite a lot when visiting the Ravenclaw Commonroom -courtesy of a very vengeful Cho Chang and company- but it had never deterred her much. When they had set her hair on fire though he had felt he needed to intervene, and practiced his Cruciatus on the Asian while hiding in a dark corner. He hadn’t told Ginny what he had done, but when the pranks ceased he was certain she knew he had done something. She had the courtesy to be grateful for it in silence and not pester him for details. He still wasn’t sure why he had done it –Ginny’s hair being on fire had been rather amusing after all- but for some reason he had had the urge to retaliate.
Her “issue” with Harry Potter was still unresolved, yet Sauron could clearly see that the black haired boy was interested in her. His interest in Cho had dwindled after the Asian’s “attack” on Ginny, and ever since he had been eyeing the redhead. Sauron still didn’t think that the scrawny boy was good enough for Ginny though… He stopped his thoughts right there. Not good enough for her? Why did he care about that? He wasn’t her brother; he didn’t need to protect her virtue! This world really had a strange influence on him… However, as always these days, Sauron found that strange didn’t necessarily mean bad. He shook his head to himself. For an immortal creature, a year was barely the blink of an eye compared to their lifespan... yet now, living among mortals for almost a year already, he realized he had done and encountered more than he sometimes did in two centuries. Because they had so little time, mortals seemed to cram as much as they could in their lives, impatiently trying to do anything and everything they set their minds to… Confusing and unpleasant as it had been in the beginning, now he was finally used to it Sauron was starting to enjoy it. Time was more valuable when there was –or seemed- little of it, and there was something invigorating about these mortal’s rushed lifestyle, something neither the Eldar, nor the Ainur had ever understood…