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mistressofbucklebury
Joined: 26 Sep 2004
Posts: 251
Location: England
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 Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 7:37 am Post subject: |
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| ghettoelleth wrote: | | a can of Fix-A-Flat, |
 ???
Colour me confused!!
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MoB
A Happy (and Horny) Little 
My name's MoB, and I'm a commaholic.
OSA's official NIT (Nazgul In Training) |
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ghettoelleth
Joined: 06 Nov 2004
Posts: 1804
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| Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 10:00 am Post subject: |
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Oh shoot, sorry honey. Fix-A-Flat is an aerosol can of this gunk you spray into a flat tire and it repairs the leak. Dang, it didn't occur to me that you guys might call it something else. Sorry MoB my darling.
Jesxxx
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"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that you can not confirm their validity." Abraham Lincoln |
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DreadLadyFreya
Joined: 30 Mar 2004
Posts: 276
Location: A fantasy world, with beach front property
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| Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 11:10 am Post subject: |
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| ghettoelleth wrote: | Next Challenge:
A condom (ribbed for her pleasure) a can of Fix-A-Flat, a dog-earred copy of Women's Wear Daily and 6 cotton balls.
Save Boromir |
Ah, Ghetto, you really DO love me! *squee* Okay, here goes… Using the Fix-A-Flat “goo” I strategically place the cotton balls upon my person and lure Boromir away the nasty Bagginses and the Precioussss. We remove the pages from the magazine and spread them out on the ground (because, really, one simply cannot enjoy a good romp with a studly Gondorian with twigs and such poking at one). Then we put the condom to good use! 
Next Challenge:
Using a pocket mirror, a package of chewing gum, and dental floss, help Gollum get the Precious from Bilbo.
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The darkness is strong, and it is patient, and it is everywhere,
and it always wins. But in the heart of its strength lies weakness -
one lone candle is enough to hold is back.
Love is more than a candle.
Love can ignite the stars. |
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VanatheEverYoung
Joined: 22 Aug 2004
Posts: 0
Location: USA
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| Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 5:11 pm Post subject: |
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| DreadLadyFreya wrote: | Next Challenge:
Using a pocket mirror, a package of chewing gum, and dental floss, help Gollum get the Precious from Bilbo. |
As Gollum:
Use the pocket mirror to cast a dazzling, shiny reflection on cave wall, which effectively distracts Bilbo. I take the wad of chewing gum out of my mouth, and stick it on a long stand of dental floss. With startling accuracy, I throw the gum wad directly onto the Precious. Absolutely disgusted with Gollum drool all over his hand, Bilbo doesn't notice me yank the dental floss, pulling the Precious out of his palm. SUCKER! MY ... PRRRRECIOUSSSSSSS!!
Next challenge:
You have: a can of Campbell's Tomato Soup, a potted plant, and a poster of Aragorn.
Mission: steal Legolas's shampoo
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 Vána, the Ever-Young
"All flowers spring as she passes and open if she glances upon them; and all birds sing at her coming." |
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ghettoelleth
Joined: 06 Nov 2004
Posts: 1804
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| Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2005 10:09 pm Post subject: |
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You have: a can of Campbell's Tomato Soup, a potted plant, and a poster of Aragorn.
Mission: steal Legolas's shampoo
Haldir addresses his troops. "Alright then men, I'm going in. If I fail to return within the hour, head for the Nimrodel in all haste." Haldir places a hand on Rumil's shoulder, another on Orophin's as he looks into the eyes of each with stern, brotherly regard as he continues his brave directive. "I mean it brothers, if I should fall, do not be concerned for me, save yourselves." He gives the shoulder of each brother a final, affectionate squeeze, causing the eyes of Rumil to water from the sheer verocity of the embrace as Orophin wimpers alarmingly not unlike a girl. The brave Haldir nods once as, swifter than their eyes can register, the mighty captain of the northern fences disappears from view, into the wilds of their backyard.
Shhh, sneak up on snoozing Legolas with open soup can...A Scout!
Pour half of soup over each eye to obscure vision...Cambell's from Tomato!
Pin poster of Aragorn in shower and leave water running full tap...A Diversion!
Grab shampoo...skulk away...think better, (not so long Haldir, *eyeroll* 'elves!') skulk back and grab conditioner too, pause briefly to read lable...lather, rinse, repeat as if the very whips of your masters were behind you!...skulk away...
Skulk some more, (skulking is good for the follicles) to where Legolas slumbers...leave plant as compensation for stolen hair care products..."It is one of the Magnolias, unless my eyes are cheated by some spell!"
Skulk back to Lorien. Attend the fifth annual sheering of the wargs with soft, supple tresses that shine like the light of the silmarils, lose your mind and become crazed by the incandescent glow of your own beauty. Slay your kin.
You have: A bamboo back scratcher, 4 Tylenol, a pool cue and a Star Trek Phazer set to hair removal....
Steal the Ring from Frodo...Good Luck Men!
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"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that you can not confirm their validity." Abraham Lincoln |
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MaglorRedeemed
Joined: 31 Jul 2004
Posts: 115
Location: The land of Mormons, green Jell-O and Orson Scott Card
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| Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2005 5:37 pm Post subject: |
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In Osgiliath, things are looking bad. The Nazgûl are attacking, the city is crumbling around the army's ears and that furry-footed little doofus still won't give up the ring! Thank goodness you, the Random Gondorian Soldier have a bamboo back scratcher, 4 Tylenol, a pool cue and a Star Trek Phazer set to hair removal.
As Frodo begins to look vacant, take a TYLENOL to combat the screeching headache the Nazûl are giving everyone, then glance at Frodo, Sam and Gollum and ask if they need one. They will readily accept. As they are occupied with the distribution of Tylenol, sneak around to the back and, attaching the PHASER to the POOL CUE, gently poke Frodo with it in the back, only hard enough to singe off individual hairs. If Frodo looks at you, just wave your sword and shout at the Nazgûl and he will assume you are innocent. As more and more hair is singed off, Frodo's back will grow more and more itchy. Seeing this, offer him the BACKSCRATCHER, and he will rapidly accept it, beginning to scratch with both hands. Then insert the POOL CUE into the hollow space in the Ring and pull it off the flimsy chain. Bask in the glory when you present it to Faramir, or run off and claim it for your own.
*****
Your mission, should you choose to accept: Defeat Smaug with only a quill pen, a large half-eaten mushroom, a rake and a CD player! (CDs of your choice.)
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Hurin: Aurë entuluva! Aurë entuluva! Aurë entuluva!
Morgoth: Mornië alantië, b*tch. |
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Alassante
Virtual Village Mod
Joined: 10 Dec 2004
Posts: 20
Location: Hitchhiking to Rivendell
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| Posted: Wed Jul 20, 2005 1:46 pm Post subject: |
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Apparently no one could do as Maglor wanted so I am reviving this thread (I went looking for it) that was so fun by the looks of it so we can play again.
Your mission, should you choose to accept it:
Steal the WK's flaming sword
using only a feather boa, Listerine (your choice of flavor), tire jack, peanut butter (crunchy or plain) and a paperback copy of the Silmarillion.
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Nagzul #2 - The Nazgul of Shmoove
Crucio! Because stupidity should be painful!
http://alikat7.livejournal.com/ |
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