[Robbie]

On the third day without internet, things really started to go pear-shaped.

We’d tried everything: the modem, the network card, the f…ing wi-fi router. All had been plugged in and out, cleaned, hugged and yelled at but our small sharehouse was in an interweb drought.

How you handle the internet going down is a truly modern test of character.

Forget sports, careers, families and relationships. It’s firewalls and ISPs that truly separate the men form the boys. And my housemates and I were failing the test.

Like feeding ourselves, for example. With a few beers under the belt and an empty pantry, a pizza delivery was the only option.

“Google Domino’s,” I said.

“Internet’s down, you crumb.”

There was 10 minutes of silence before someone Eureka’d, “Yellow Pages!”

They were still sitting in our front garden somewhere, wrapped in plastic.

“WTF. There’s no Domino’s under D.”

It’s under P eff-wit… for pizza.”

“Why do they set it out like that?”

“I dunno. It must be like the Dewey Decimal System or something.”

“That doesn’t sound right.”

“OK. Now they say they are only doing pick-up. We’ll have to get a cab. What’s the number?”

“Dunno. Check that big book.”

“Is it under Y for Yellow? C for cab or T for Taxi?”

Unfortunately, this episode wasn’t the low point.

Housemate A’s new hobby – nay addiction – to YouTube trampoline accidents was going unsatisfied and he was getting irritable.

Personally, I usually check news websites every 72 seconds so I was 3250 does in arrears.

Facebook quizzes were going unanswered, composures we being lost. Rumour was there was a photo of a guy on Facebook with his arm around my girlfriend but I couldn’t check it. We were like a house of crack addicts climbing the walls. Hell, we couldn’t even eat.

Later, I Googled internet addiction. I Googled the shite out of it. I found a piece in the American Journal of Psychiatry by one Dr Jerald Block or Oregon Health and Science University who says internet addiction is a clinical disorder.

He lists symptoms. Losing track of time or neglecting to eat or sleep? Check. Cravings and feeling of withdrawal including anger? Check. Tension or depression when a computer cannot be accessed? Check. Lying, fatigue, social isolation and poor achievement? Checkity Checkske.

I wish I could tell you we didn’t resort to driving around with our laptops in the car looking for wireless that wasn’t password protected. (For the record: Stealing internet is wrong. Would you steal a car?)

Alex Dickinson in an mX reporter who forgot the pay the internet bill.

(Copied from mX News, August 21 2008. Most definitely copyright of News Corporation, but as this isn’t available on line, such a shame to lose such a wonderfully, home hitting article!)

[Haleth]

That just about covers it!

Sadly, I'm old enough to know how the Yellow Pages work without having to guess the catetories.

[ellisk]

Yep, this is what hurricanes do to me. Glad to have not had any yet this year.

[SilvaraDragontear]

Oh yes that hit a bit close to home.
When Internet doesn't work at my home I am still sitting infront of the computer after many tries to jumpstart the modem and waiting for the internet to come back while strumming mig fingers on the desk clicking on the internet explorer button every five minute and getting more irritated you longer I have to wait for my fix.
While all this is going on I go slowely insane.
And yes i have since long realised that I am addicted to internet.

[Alassante]

I need to put the password back on my wireless router but I'm afraid I'll lose the ability to connect and have to actually connect with a cord until I figure it out.

But I'm not addicted. Nope, not me.

[Sulriel]

OMG! LMAO!! Not addicted, oh no. .. not me .. no ... *whimper*

[vladazhael]