[NeumeIndil]

So I'm in a wedding on Monday. Sunday night is the Bachelorette/Hen Night/Home Spa Day with the bridal party. As part of the evening's fun, we're having a White Elephant Gift Exchange, definition here. The theme for the gift exchange is "naughty and/or bedroom". Now naughty, even among my perverted friends, is generally a market I've got cornered, but when it comes to this.... I'm at a complete loss!

I'd like to contribute something funny but still somewhat sexy. I don't want to just go buy flavored condoms and tape them on lollipop sticks, and considering the religious nature of some of the crowd, I'm not sure a dollar bin porn DVD would be a good idea either. So, I turn to my headquarters of smut, and some of the perviest fanciers of lads and elves and hobbits on the 'Net.

Suggestions Ladies (and lurking gentlemen)?

[Viv]

Perhaps something bedroom-decorish that is vaguely phallic -- like a tall candle or incense burner -- so that when it's wrapped up folks will think it's "naughty" but really it's "bedroom." That way you can get a chuckle out of it without having to deal with the uptight folks getting into a snit.

Or you could totally snittify them, which would probably be where I'd head on this.

[NeumeIndil]

You know me, I'd like to snittify the daylights out of them. One of my half-formed ideas was a "Yummy Sex Kit" with a jar of chocolate shell, some whipped cream, a creamstick (for "The Doughnut Trick") and some Fruit Roll-ups (for "The Fruit Roll-up Trick"), some Altoids/mints... but I can't think of much food stuff that's useable in the bedroom, etc.

But phallic... now that I might be able to work with. Thanks Viv!

[NeumeIndil]

Heh heh heh. I took your "vaguely phallic" idea and ran with it. Pics coming soon.

[Sulriel]

[Viv]

Pics? And a cream stick for the Donut Trick? This is a version I don't know. It's not just the "here, try on a cream-filled, sweetie," eh?

Neume, you are an infinite source of pervy wisdom.

[NeumeIndil]

Before wrapping: http://picasaweb.google.com/beckyhahn/TheJonesMarlettWeddingExtravaganza#5371382148154293282

After wrapping: http://picasaweb.google.com/beckyhahn/TheJonesMarlettWeddingExtravaganza#5371382169276444754

And the Creamstick Trick is rather like using a Creamstick as an extension, which must be nibbled off before commencing with anything else.

[Viv]

Bwahaha! Did everybody get it? I think the black curly ribbon really finishes the look.

[Sulriel]

*screams laughing* Perfect!!!!!!!!!!!

[NeumeIndil]

Luckily the conservative types weren't there. And the rest definitely got it... My favorite comment was "Wait, why... OMG Blue Balls!"

I was trumped, however, by the mini bullet vibe, Deep Throat Numbing Spray, and Anal Eze lube gift, and the Nipple Decoration kit (with non-pierced nipple rings, body glitter, and kiwi strawberry flavored warming nipple gel).

The bride ended up with the Bondage Duck: http://www.spicygear.com/i-rub-my-duckie-bondage/

And actually put in the batteries and let him float around in the tub for a while. I think I want one for my birthday.

[dolarabee]

[Kilby6]

Hey do you have any suggestion where i can enjoy last bachelor days of my life with my friends? I want to book best bachelorette party nyc venue. Which one should i opt for?