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Reviews by Frostfire613

StoryReview
Of storks and elflings (R)
by Nuredhel.
Chapters [1]
Reviews [1]
Warnings [Sexual situations, language.]
Fri Mar 20, 2015 11:10 pm
This was a very cute story! The only things I would change is perhaps the use of slang language. When they were explaining the manners of sex to Fanarille, I thought that it would be batter if you had used actual medical terms instead of the slang terms. Like sex instead of F***ing, penis instead of member, and so forth. Other than that, you just to space out your paragraphs and dialogue speech and everything would be great!