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Seronocuil
Joined: 12 Jun 2003
Reviews: 1
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Thu Jun 12, 2003 3:39 am
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You told me to review so I'm reviewin'. Of course this is the coolest story!! I want to find out when Aragorn first meets Legolas and what does Arwen say when she sees him since you left me hangin'. I know what's gonna happen for awhile. I want to know what happens when they get to the dang city!! hurry up and post!! I wonder if this shirt makes me look fat? Oh, shut up Legolas. Isn't that a sign of pregnancy??? Well, I'm tired and I'm talking to you in the little IM thingy. So I'm done with this review.
Your Mellon,
Julianna (Eowyn)
P.S. No, Legolas, we don't have pickles.
P.P.S. Hey, another sign of pregnancy!!!
P.P.P.S. By the Valar.. I just want a pickle!!!!
P.P.P.P.S. I'm sure you do!!!!!!!
P.P.P.P.P.S. Don't you just love my review? |
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Viv
Joined: 25 Apr 2003
Reviews: 673
Location: Texas
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Thu Jun 12, 2003 6:39 pm
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This is an interesting AU, and I'm glad you were up-front about that. I understand the conflict and have an idea about events to come, so the Prologue was a success. There are some weaker spots in chapter 1, but I'll just point out two. First of all, Tolkien's female elves weren't much for fighting (with a very few notable exceptions). Yours may be different, but you should explain why and how. Let us know that it is perfectly normal for a female child to be given a sword and sent off to battle. Second, long before spending 2,000 years in slavery, a Tolkien elf would have died of grief (for an example of how little elves can withstand opression and torment, re-read the tale of Elrond's wife Celebrian). Finally, please ask someone to beta this piece for spelling and grammar. While a writer shouldn't stress too much about the technical stuff whilst she is writing, a beta to fix these little things can really make the end product more enjoyable. Thanks for posting and letting me read; I look forward to seeing future chapters.  |
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Nikara
Joined: 26 Aug 2003
Reviews: 1
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Sun Sep 07, 2003 12:02 am
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This is a really fun story to read. I love this kind of thing, because we know things that the characters don't know yet!  Keep going, this is very good! |
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ViJanaway
Joined: 07 May 2004
Reviews: 78
Location: Near Dallas, Texas
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Wed May 12, 2004 7:54 pm
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It is an interesting concept. But I hate seeing elves as slaves.
I like the way you portray Aragorn. |
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glitteringrainclouds
Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Reviews: 33
Location: uk
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Thu Jul 22, 2004 5:08 pm
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| A great story.You must post more quick as i am itching to see Aragorn and Legolas' first meeting. Its a shame that men are portrayed as the bad guys but heck we cant win them all lol! |
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Cakresvari
Joined: 04 May 2004
Reviews: 8
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Thu Sep 09, 2004 4:45 pm
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Please add more chapters. If you don't I'll  . |
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Shadow
Joined: 18 Jun 2006
Reviews: 32
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Tue Jul 25, 2006 5:56 am
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| Please add more! i liked this idea though the slavery makes me sad |
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