The Dare

Chapter 5 A Kiss

It was twilight before I could see to Halan. I checked his flank where the sword had cut him. Elred had dressed it well. He would probably have a scar. Despite the injury, he was feeling frisky and began nudging me for a carrot.
“I have no carrots for you right now. But when we get back to Minas Tirith, you shall have your fill.” I began to brush him.
“You did well today. A true horse of Rohan.” He shook his head at me. “Don’t be getting too proud now.” He whinnied back at me. I laughed. Despite everything that had happened that day, it felt good to laugh. To speak with my natural voice.

The men had given me a wide berth after my sex became common knowledge. The wounded ones gruffly acknowledged me but the general dismay of the company was palpable. I saw Faramir speaking to Elred. I berated myself for not considering the consequences of my actions on Elred. I tried to say something to him. But he waved me off. “I knew what we were getting into. I will be fine.”

“Mistress Eolindė.” A gentle voice called. I turned and saw Faramir standing near by with a trencher of bread, stew and flask of wine. “When did you last eat?” he said smiling. My breath caught in my throat. How was it that this man can fight in a battle and still look so handsome? My stomach rumbled audibly. I had been caught up with treating the wounded that I forgot to eat. The tension was broken as we both laughed. He led me to a log nearby and placed the food in my hand. He sat across from me.

“Captain, I…” He waved his hand.

“We will talk after you eat.”

I devoured the bread and stew. The wine warmed me. As I finished, I looked up and saw Faramir’s face. He seemed to be thinking about something.
“Captain Faramir, sir. I do not know what to say…” He looked at me with mild disapproval.

“I knew your father as friend. Because of that friendship, I will not scold you nor did I scold your brother. Though I did ask him if he had any other “cousins” I needed to know about.” I looked down at the ground and my heart pounded in my chest.
“You see, I knew it was you from the morning of the muster.” My mouth dropped open and my eyes widened with shock. I looked at him.

“You knew? But how?” I asked, my voice trembling.

“My lady. I would never have allowed a complete stranger to join the Rangers on foray. Your disguise was very good but I knew Eored had a twin sister who could fight and had an interest in healing. And, despite your efforts to the contrary, you had too much grace in your walk to be a man. It only could have been you.” He finished with a smile.

“Then why did you let me come?” I asked, standing up.

“I assumed you had a good reason and you did nothing to attract attention to yourself. I trusted Elred’s judgement. But I did worry that when it came time to fight.”

“I am sorry for causing you to worry. It was never my intention to cause anyone to worry.” Faramir stood up, took my chin in his hand and looked at me.

“Then why did you do it?” he asked. His grey eyes bored into my soul.

“Elred dared me to do it. I know that sounds silly but it’s the truth.” I stuttered out. He looked stunned and his hand left my chin.

“A dare? You did this on a dare?” he roared. His eyes were hard.

“Well that wasn’t the only reason. I wanted to see if I could really fight not just spar or do drills. I needed to find out if I was capable of defending my home and loved ones if need be.” I trailed off apologetically. His look softened.

“And are you?” he asked.

Yes, I am. But I found that I prefer to heal injuries, than inflict them.”

“Well there are several here that are grateful for your abilities to heal. There is no telling how Dior might have fared if you had not come to his aid.”

“You were right. Battle is not glorious. It’s dirty and bloody and wasteful. Herion, Berelach and Ondohal are dead. They leave behind loved ones. We can’t even take their bodies back to Minas Tirith for a decent burial.” There were tears in my eyes as the memories of the fight flooded back. Faramir put his arms around me. My tears fell on his shoulder.

As my tears slowed, I became aware of Faramir’s presence. There was a familiar comfort to the odors of leather, wood and horse. I reluctantly pulled away. Wiping my eyes with a spare strip of bandage, I said, “I am sorry. I did not intend to turn into a weeping willow.”

“Many a new soldier has broken down after their first battle. I would have had more concern for you if you had not.,” he said gently.

Our eyes met and the air seemed to grow thick. He put his arms around me and I felt his lips on mine. There was such sweetness in that kiss. He kissed me again more deeply. I could feel his sorrow and his passion. It was if I had taken a large drink of monscinan. My body grew warm and my blood pounded in my ears. No fumbling stable kiss had ever felt like this. I did not know exactly what it was that I was feeling. I just knew I did not want him to stop.

Suddenly, it stopped. Faramir had pulled away and his back was to me.

“My lord, I… what…?” I put my hand on his arm. He pushed my hand away. I walked around to face him. There was anguish written all over his face.

“No Eolindė! I will not do this. I will not dishonor the friendship I have with your father by dishonoring you.”

“But Faramir, I do not understand. I do not feel dishonored.” I was confused and shaken. He looked at me with sympathy.

“I know. For all your knowledge of the healing arts and war, you are still very much an innocent. If we were to continue, I would use you to forget my cares. It would not be as it should be between a man and a woman. I can not and will not use you in that way. I can not waver in my responsibilities.”

“Is it because I am not ladylike?” I asked.

“No.” He clasped my hands and kissed them. “Eolindė, you are both brave and lovely. I would feel the same if we were in Minas Tirith and you were a lady of the court. I can not take your innocence to ease my own pain.” He dropped my hands and stepped back.

“Tomorrow at first light, I am sending the bulk of the company to Henneth Annun. Those left, including myself, will escort you and the wounded back to Minas Tirith. My heart is filled with dread. War is coming, Boromir has been gone without word for too long.” He looked at me steadily. “You will be needed, Eolindė. Dior needs you.” He said earnestly.

My heat felt as though someone had run a knife through. Weariness came over me. “Yes, my lord.” I answered and I began walking back toward the camp.

Faramir’s mention of Dior reminded me that I needed to check on my patients. I made my way to Elred. He had been keeping watch over the wounded. I tapped him on the shoulder and he looked up concern on his face. “How is Halan?” he asked quietly.

“Halan? Oh yes, he is well. Thank you for seeing to him.”

“You are welcome. Did Captain Faramir find you?” he asked innocently.

A flush crept over my face. Thankful for the dim light, I replied, “Yes. His friendship with our father spared us a good tongue-lashing. And he knew it was me.”

“He knew! But we were so careful.” Elred said with amazement.
“Not careful enough but it is over and done with. I am going back to Minas Tirith with the wounded in the morning. Most will be able to ride. But Dior…” I trailed off.

“We will deal with it in the morning. I need to ask though. Are you all right?” he asked hesitantly.

“If you mean did I enjoy my experience of battle. No, I did not. I do not think I will be joining any more war parties. Today has cured me of any desire for glory on the field of battle. From now on, I will be a healer and fight only if necessary.” I said sadly.

I heard a sigh of relief from Elred. “You are tired, Eolindė. Get some rest.”

“What about my patients?” I asked.

“I will keep watch. I will awaken you if anyone needs anything.” He replied.

I lay down on my roll and fell into a dreamless sleep.

monscinan = made up Anglo-Saxon word for moonshine

translation courtesy of Novedhelion