[Amlee]

"8" of the Dumbest People in 2004.


1. AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked
intellectual leadership.
He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter
who's lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland,California spent two hours attempting to subdue a
gunman
who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas
canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in
the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and
forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the
kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY!
A man walked into aTopeka, Kansas, Kwik Stop and asked for all the
money in
the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the
store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police
showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT???
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just
couldn't
control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the
lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the
man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??
A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her
contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?"
the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!!
In Modesto,California, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold
up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a
finger to simulate a gun, but, unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in
his pocket (hellllllooooooo!)

8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!)
Last summer, on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert an hour east of
Bakersfield,California, somefolks new to boating were having a problem.
No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft
boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how
much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they
putted over to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what
was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working
condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the
propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys
jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was
laughing so hard................

Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

[Elvenesse]

[inglor]

[DreadLadyFreya]

[inglor]

[Amlee]

[Elvenesse]

[inglor]

It is a hard pain to describe, its like nausea but sharper, more like a real hard ache. The pain takes over the whole area, from the inside out, not just localized to the testes. Most unlpeasant. I have seen people throw up after being hit hard. I don't think there is a female equivalent. But you guys give birth and have periods so I ain't complaining

Inglor

[ArtanisOrangeBlossom]

Try getting your breast blind-sided by 3 different book bags. There's a sharp pain

[Elvenesse]

[Elvenesse]

[ArtanisOrangeBlossom]

my mom knows a woman (who's middle child is one of my good friends) who had 3 children at home..

with JUST a mid-wife

[SpaceWeavil]

[SpaceWeavil]

[Yavanie]

[/quote]

That does sound unpleasant (and still weird). But then again, giving birth is a lot more prolonged. Has anyone here managed to give birth without painkillers?[/quote]


Yes three times.


let me qualify that by saying the anesthesiologist was on standby with the first one. By the time I asked for the pain killer the doctor said, too late, one push and we were done (I have mild labor for hours, annoying but not truly painful, the last 20 minutes however....)

Child number two: doctor came in to say hi and that he was going for coffee. I told him not to leave, that it wouldn't be long; he laughed and left. 10 minutes later Rocheron and a nurse with one glove barely on caught him.

Number 3: at home with a midwife, she promised to be there and she was.

Always said medication wasn't my first choice but I reserve the right to change my mind AT ANY MOMENT. I am very fortunate that birth for me was relatively easy. I know it is not that way for everyone. And thank God we live in a time when there ARE options and no one has to suffer (until they get to potty training).