Sacrifices

Soon exhaustion began to overcome the queen and king and they agreed that it was best to say their goodbyes and retire for the evening. Tomorrow they would leave for Rohan to avoid the harsh winter weather that was predicted. Eomer wanted to get Lothiriel back to the Mark as soon as he could; he was missing his home and wanted to show off his bride. As they said their goodbyes prince Imrahil could not help but smile broadly. He had indeed chosen well for his daughter; Lothiriel looked upon Eomer with admiration and he looked upon her with sincere love.

Back in the bridal suite Lothiriel slumped into a chair in front of the fireplace. “I am exhausted Eomer. Who would have believed that the bride would be this tired on her wedding night?”

“It has been a very eventful day for us. Tomorrow we leave for Rohan we should be well rested. The journey is not difficult but it is long and tiring at times.” He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and lightly kissed her neck.

It was true she was tired, and it was also true Eomer was starting to drive her crazy with his well placed kisses. Loti wondered how long her diplomacy could last under these circumstances. Then the conflict came; head verses heart. Her head was trying to reconcile the fact that Eomer did not cause Rufio’s death and that even though things were painful it seemed to have worked out for the best. Loti’s heart, while joyous at being with the king, was beginning to grieve again for Rufio and what could have been. Then there was the sex. Eomer was definitely succeeding in seducing her and it was their wedding night. It had been months and he was driving her wild with his kisses and caresses; but her head overruled desire. She pulled away from him, leaving him confused.

“I am sorry Eomer but this is…is…” she could not find an appropriate word to describe the feelings that ran through her. “This is too quick.” There, she had found a word that although did not show her emotions it brought up a reason why they should go slow.

“Too quickly? This morning you desired nothing else but to be in my arms and now you say I move to quickly? I have desires as well and if I have read you wrong that is not my fault.”

“I…it is…I do not know what to say or do Eomer. Everything has happened so quickly that I have not had time to settle my thoughts. I do desire you my king, but there is so much more going on that I can not give myself to you the way we both deserve.” Loti hoped he understood.

Eomer stood thoughtful for a moment, looking as if he was remembering something in the past. “That lady that made you upset tonight, Mabd the aunt to your friend I noticed that after you spoke with her you did not smile anymore. I also noticed that when I told of my acquaintance with her nephew you looked as if you were becoming ill.”

Loti did not know what to say or do. “I am glad that you are so perceptive Eomer.”

“You mock me?” He thought that his wife had made an off center retort to his ability to notice things.

“No, I do not mock you. You saw rightly that I was upset, that is all I meant.” She reached for him and this time he pulled away.

“We are married Lothiriel Queen of Rohan. You should be able to tell me anything. I want to know what made my wife so upset tonight. What did I say or do to put you in such a melancholy mood? I know that you are giving up home and family for me and I understand that that is traumatic for you but I had an interesting conversation with Mabd Lothiriel. What is the connection between you and her nephew?”

“Who is Rufio?” He finally came out and asked.

“It is a long story Eomer, one that spans my lifetime.”

“I want to hear it.”

“It is sad Eomer and will only bring us down.”

“You are already down my lady. Tell me!” He did not mean to sound so stern when he spoke and his tone clearly startled Lothiriel.

Lothiriel knew that she should tell Eomer the truth but she did not know how he would take it. How would a man so use to war and bloodlust handle the fact that his wife loved the man responsible for his rescue? What did Mabd say to him? She thought back on his actions during the day and felt that it would be ok to tell him everything.

Eomer sat on the bed listening to his wife’s story of Rufio, Elphir and herself in childhood. Lothiriel paced as she spoke and not once looked him directly in the eye, something he found lacking in her character and he made it known.

Interrupting Lothiriel’s story he demanded that she stop pacing and look at him when she spoke. It was bothering him greatly that she was behaving so disrespectfully toward him.

“I am giving you the answer you desire so I would advise you to shut up and let me finish it on my own terms.” Eomer’s command that she stop pacing and look at him angered her. Here she was telling him her deepest secrets and he had not the respect to hear her out.

“I can not read you when you turn away from me. How can I trust you to tell me the truth if I can not see your face and read your eyes?” It sounded so logical to him; that was how it was in his eored. The men spoke looking him in the eye so he could read what they were saying between the lines. Lothiriel was not doing that and it was irritating.

“I am telling you the truth Eomer, why do you not stop thinking about yourself and listen to me.”

“Thinking about myself? Wanting to hear about my wife’s past is thinking about me?”

“You are not wanting to hear my past my lord; you want to interrogate me, make me humble to you. No, that is not how this relationship will work so get over yourself and realize that they are two people united.”

“I just can not believe that someone as beautiful as you would stay faithful to a man for so long, especially in your youth. It is impossible to believe that only one man has known you.”

“What? When did this become about my sexual past? How many women have known you? And are you saying because I am pretty that I can not remain faithful to someone I love dearly? That I am some wench that professes love to one man while bedding another?” She was trying to get her point across that Eomer was being ridiculous in his accusations but he did not understand.

Eomer could not explain the sudden surge of energy that raged in him. It felt like he was going into battle with the darkest of foes. Jealousy took over and all logic left him. “You said it yourself. My suspicions have been confirmed.” His ego was hurting right now.

“Did you even hear what I said?” Loti was very angry. It was apparent that he did not listen to her story about Rufio and that he was not listening to her now.

“I heard that you have a problem remaining faithful to one man.” In his mind he was debating if he had heard it or not, but his ego was now desperately trying to recover itself, from what he could not fathom. He tried to stop what came out of his mouth next but he could not.

“I will let you in on my secret Lothiriel, I married you out of political pressure. Do you think that I would not have chosen a woman of Rohan before I chose a brat such as yourself? It is political Lothiriel, arranged by your father and Aragorn. I agreed to it simply to get my advisors off my back. Rohan needs a queen and it just so happened that a marriage to you would strengthen alliances between Rohan and Gondor. That is all there is to it Lothiriel.” He stormed out of the chamber!

In the hallway Eomer ran into Finduilas who knew immediately that something was wrong. He passed by her and headed to Aragorn’s room.

The knock on his door brought the king out of his book. “Enter” he was not expecting Eomer.

“Eomer? What brings you to my room on your wedding night?”

“She would not stop pacing and look me in the eyes as she was telling me some story about her past relationship with a man. I overheard her and a lady during the feast and when I confronted her about it she began telling me these lies.”

“How do you know they are lies?” Aragorn was suspicious of his friend.

“She would not look me in the eyes Aragorn. You know that is a common trait of liars.”

Everything became clear to Aragorn. “You can not treat her as you do one of your men Eomer. I do not know where you even thought that was a good idea. Did you ever stop to think that her memories were painful ones that she did not want to share but shared anyway because you two are now married?”

It was as if someone had smacked the King of Rohan up the side of the head. His pride left and he became aware of what was truly going on in the chamber before he became such a jerk. He did not know how to treat his wife so treating her like one of his men seemed like an easy out. They were always respectful to his wishes to get inside their heads, Lothiriel was not and he had not realized the difference.

He wondered what exactly he had heard and what he had selected to ignore out of his wife’s mouth. “I let pride get in the way and said words to her in anger that I did not mean. I have been married less then half a day and have already messed it up probably beyond repair.”

“Yes, you have messed up,” came a voice from the hall. “She is absolutely livid yet crushed at the same time. Not a good combination in my princess. King Elessar, perhaps you may be able to intervene in this affair.” Finduilas was crafty that much Aragorn knew.

“I will explain it to you on my lady’s behalf.” She quoted Eomer’s final words to the princess verbatim. ‘I will let you in on my secret Lothiriel, I married you out of political pressure. Do you think that I would not have chosen a woman of Rohan before I chose a brat such as yourself? It is political Lothiriel, arranged by your father and Aragorn. I agreed to it simply to get my advisors off my back. Rohan needs a queen and it just so happened that a marriage to you would strengthen alliances between Rohan and Gondor. That is all there is to it Lothiriel.”

“No love, no respect, no compassion and only selfishness that is not the way to start off a marriage.” Finduilas looked to Aragorn for support.

Aragorn looked at Eomer. “She is correct Eomer; those things that you said are enough to destroy any chance you might have had to start off on the right footing.”

Weakly Eomer pleaded to Aragorn. “Aragorn what can I do? I did not mean what I spoke to her, you know that. You know that I love Lothiriel and cherish her and have pledged my life to her. It was a misunderstanding; we are still getting to know each other. Do I not get a second chance?”

Getting up to follow Finduilas to the bridal chamber Aragorn put his hand on Eomer’s shoulder. “I do not know if you will get a second chance my friend. I warned you about her temper.”

Inside the chamber Loti sat with Elphir; as of now only Finduilas, Eomer, Aragorn, Elphir and she knew of the argument that had taken place.

Eomer stormed into the chamber ahead of Aragorn. His presence was not welcomed and Elphir made that fact known. It was Aragorn that stopped the two from coming to blows, but what Aragorn stopped Eomer continued.

Realizing that the only thing he could do was apologize profusely he begged Loti to forgive him.

“I am not political pawn Eomer. You have created a mess out of my life and I will not forgive or forget that.” To add more sting to her words she paraphrased the king’s earlier remark.

“I married you out of political pressure Eomer. Do you think that I would not have chosen a man of Gondor if I had been given the opportunity before I chose a bastard such as yourself? It is political Eomer arranged by my father. I had no say in the matter and my attempt to make the best out of the situation was wrong. I was wrong to do so and I will not suffer being wrong again.”

Eomer knew he was not going to get out of this one by conventional means; he needed action not words at this time. But she was angry and unpredictable so he had to act quickly. He hoped that Aragorn would back him up, but if not he knew he could not let Lothiriel go without a fight.