Reviews by Rhapsody

Paradox of the Fourth Age · Sat Sep 02, 2006 1:27 pm

A wonderful chapters about the concequences of death and living a life. Laureanna's task is fulfilled and the future is secure... but that comes at a great cost, maybe the disappearance of herself to fate? Hmmm intriguing. Now keep your fingers moving over the keyboard and update soon!

Another Man's Cage · Fri Sep 01, 2006 3:33 pm

*sighs happily* Chapter 6 already! Just like Maedhros, your stories read so fluently that I sometimes forget that we are only in the beginning of the story and this time it is from Maedhros' perspective. Yay! There is so much I loved about this chapter. Where shall I begin? *thinks*

Maedhros musing on time compared with the energetic Celegorm a few chapters before is very striking. Where the young Tyelko cannot wait for the next day to begin, Maedhros is really close to coming of age with more rest in his soul.

Macalaurë likes to use big words when he is angry, as though they make less obvious the sheer childish satisfaction of pointless complaining.

Aww Maglor, I just felt that I should come to the rescue and escort him to a long and comfy bath.. Very Happy smiley face

Atar gets up early every day to care for the garden, and his diligence is obvious: The dirt is soft and dark, neatly turned; there is not a weed or yellowed leaf to be seen. Just like Atar. Meticulous. Perfect.

Hmmmm maybe Feanor should come over here and tend my jungle garden. Smile smiley face

(Macalaurë served a weeklong sentence washing dishes when he was little for swearing by Nienna’s tears after he dropped a piece of stone on his foot.) ROFL smiley face

*wipes away the tears from laughter* Hehehe

Okay, ahem. I like the build up on tension in this part... I can see those two sitting there like: okay we insulted the Valar, mother is very stern towards us about it.. and then this:
Atar came back a minute later and offered the bottle to us first before drinking of it himself; I was so nervous that the water only sat in my mouth; I couldn’t swallow it and might have eventually drowned on it, if Atar hadn’t said, “Those swears were pretty good, Macalaurë and Nelyo, but I know the two of you can do better.” He pushed the bottle back into my hands and went back to hammering on a carving knife that he was making for our mother.

Well the two lads didn't see that one coming!!

Oh and Tyelko!! He is so... awww. He is most certainly my favourite in your story and the way he interacts with Maedhros is just... awww. Not very eloquent huh. But the slamming into Nelyo's tree like legs, his anxiety to loose his eldes brother is just very touching. The moment where Feanor bestows his gifts on his sons is just marvellous and I hope they steal a lot of hearts during this gathering Smile smiley face

Another great chapter Dawn!

Eternal · Thu Aug 31, 2006 4:57 pm

Wow, this is simply amazing. I had a hard time to put this story down and just when you thought: now they will tell each other how they feel, something else happens. Sometimes I thought: let’s lock these two up in a room for a while. But it was worth the wait.

What a great story girl! The torment and pain you put your characters through is so tangible and when they finally get there and see the sun and the moon for the first time… that is such a magical moment! What I also found extremely well written is the way you showed us how the Golondrim culture – a very special one – came into being. This whole story feels like a testimony to Tolkien’s creation on how the exiles found their home in Nevrast, and later on in Gondolin. And now Maeglin, poor Maeglin without a father or a mother… but he has Ecthelion to look after him. Oh, I feel so so sorry for him. So yeah, I am really hoping that a new chapter will follow soon and I am also looking forward to the story of Ecthelion & Aredhel that you have planned. Great writing Trekqueen!

Please update Soon smiley face

Remembrance · Sun Aug 27, 2006 6:00 pm

How very sad that Maglor still has survived throughout the ages. It makes you wish that Eru brings on the final and last battle soonish don't you think?

Another Man's Cage · Fri Aug 25, 2006 10:52 am

It's Friday and I have two chapters to read! Yay! This time both chapters are written from Carnistir's point of view. There are so many parts that I liked in this chapter that either made me laugh, moved & touched me so deeply, that I just leave it with impressions this time... Wink smiley face

I love the way you write the children's reaction and perception of Finwë. And as an icing on the cake how Feanor so deeply loves his own father. With these two chapters you showed us how deep Feanor's wound is regarding the loss of his mother and how he tries to deal with it the best way he possibly can, but it still cuts him deeply. Carnistir and food will always make me laugh. Children's perception of food are so true, I mean I even still don't like wine and I had to chuckle when I read Carnistir's description of wine. It is also a delight to see how Carnistir describes his brothers, their interactions and oh so deep love they have for each other. The moment when you wrote about how all four tried to deal with their parents fight. In wel chosen words and excellent descriptions and portrayal of emotions you give us the image on how all four try to console each other. Nelyo's cry in thoughts I wish I was not the oldest.

But then, so pure and simply, you write about the pain, the lovemaking of Feanor and Nerdanel: how they match each other and simply are made for each other.. How he can confide in his love and how she tries to soothe his pain... so incredibly moving.

There is so much more I loved about these two chapters, I think I can continue for quite some more pages (and I am certain you don't mind), but I want to thank you for sharing these two fabulous chapters with us.

You rock smiley face

I am looking forward to next week!

Eternal · Thu Aug 24, 2006 4:45 am

I already told you I started to read this story (with so many chapters in store I waited with a review) about a year ago. I started to re-read it again (am currently at chapter 15) and yet again I am swept of my feet, discovering new and beautiful things in this gem of a story... again. I cried when Elrilya lost her parents, I surely didn't had enough tissues around for that and this simply prooves your outstanding craftmanship in story telling. I am addicted again... A grande story that I simply cannot put down.

Glistening · Sun Aug 13, 2006 9:12 am

Oww Ellie, your take on Elladan and Elrohir is quite refreshing. You managed to give the two of them quite a different personality with their own motives to fight for the good cause. One is driven by vengeance, the other whishes to keep the family together.

His sword, ever at his side was his lover and guardian now. His daggers and knives were the precious presence kept close to his skin. His bow and quiver of arrows were his offspring. His pleasures of the flesh were goring the meat and sinew of the enemy.

When Sauron was defeated, when this war was done, then he would take thought for a mate. Until then, his only passion would be war.

This Elladan is simply chilling and I would be far out of his way when he's on a killing spree, that's for sure!

It was up to him and his twin to be the healers for the family now. And heal they would. With knives and bows and arrows and swords of steel, they would bind Arda’s wounds, cleanse the poison from their own fëar. Then one day, when the last orc was dead, their family could be whole and well again.

And Elrohir the healer, the one that will go at length to keep them together. This makes me wonder what Elrohir would have done to persuade Arwen to stay within the family once he realises that Arwen will choose a different fate... causing a wound in the already hurt family. Ellie: your writing is such a treat to read! Thank you for sharing it!

Another Man's Cage · Fri Aug 11, 2006 5:47 pm

Another beautiful chapter Dawn! I am enjoying this re-read a lot. Oh y I had to laugh so hard while I read this chapter, from a serious dinner gathering, to chaos to joy, tenderness and a confused Tyelko who is so hurt on what he founds out.

What a visual do you give me here Dawn... Just amazing. Very Happy smiley face

Carnistir takes a big spoonful of mashed peas and catapults them into the side of Atar’s face, where they stick in his hair and make him flinch in surprise.

“…and so if you reverse the magnets, then—” Nelyo is saying when he is hit by flecks of mashed peas that had missed hitting Atar and flown past to hit him.

And Macalaurë's calm reaction...

Macalaurë calmly chews his sweet potatoes, reaches for his glass in front of my plate, and takes a long swig of wine.

I really would have like to be there at that moment!

Awww and little Tyelko, trying so hard to do his utter best for his father, wishing to show him that he is ready for the forge too.

“I wish only to do right by you, to be a worthy teacher, and to rush forward now would not be for the best. Do you understand?”

“Yes.” I swallow, make my voice brave. “I do.” I meet his eyes and know that I will never exceed him. I will try—oh, I will try—but never will I exceed him.

He says no more, and his hand lingers on my face for a moment, then lifts, leaving my skin chilled. I shiver, not because the water is cold, but because I am bereft. He does not notice; he is gazing at the floor again.

This is such an incredibly insight in Celegorm's character and the foreshadowing of his life and fate... simply amazing!

This is such a great story and well, I know there are so many chapters to come. Thanks for posting this chapter Dawn, I loved it!

Another Man's Cage · Fri Aug 04, 2006 4:10 pm

Owww, there is so much family dynamics in there. Where can I sign up to help the guys cooking dinner the next time? I just love little Caranthir and Feanor together. Actually every interaction feels so free from the darkness we get from the Silmarillion: simply the warm fuzzies!

Ow and Dawn:

Macalaurë is dressed in a white tunic and loose gray trousers, barefoot, with his hair unrestrained, but Nelyo is a mess. Summer is imminent, and the library is sweltering. (Had I awakened, freezing, just a short while ago? It seems doubtful now.) Nelyo’s clothes are bedraggled; he’s shed all but a short-sleeved tunic unlaced to mid-chest and a pair of breeches rolled off his ankles

simply *guh* Drool Bucket smiley face

what an image. Yum!

WHISPERS IN THE STREAM · Fri Aug 04, 2006 2:44 pm

*snifles* What an inevitable ending Jenni. It leaves me wondering why Haleth didn't seek out a healer of her own tribe for a potion fitting for her instead for the elves. Yet, which makes it a great story: you write it splendidly. The whole set up is just so good, I mean I can clearly see why Haleth did this, but wow this is so heartbreaking. I bet this leaves Caranthir with a lot of what if's, Orithil with a huge burden of guilt upon her shoulders (maybe she never considered that a human pregnancy worked differently) which will most likely undo her. I praise her for telling Caranthir though, she comes across as such a caring and honest woman...

So yes, I love the way you wrote this story, full circle, with the seasonal themes so perfectly worked out, you are bringing us such a tragedy: Tolkien style. Respekt smiley face

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Reviews by Rhapsody