Reviews by Ariel

What Dreams May Come · Thu Sep 25, 2003 1:45 pm

I still love this story! It's got some of the sweetest 'moments' I have yet read in fanfic. Thank you for posting it. Glad to see you posting this here because I was getting lonesome without some other hobbit folk around!

Ariel

The Cursed Queen of Angmar · Sat Sep 20, 2003 11:00 am

KhazarKhum said
> Thank you for reading it!
> Right now all the finished chapters are available here at OS ( and the Other Place). The next chapter is about to go off & get beta-ed.
>
> khazar

Oh, believe me, the pleasure is all mine! I am now caught up and was not disappointed. I must say, those folks who won't read an OFC miss out on a heck of a good fic. This story is better than much of the original fiction that is published! It has all the elements I enjoy in a good original fantasy tale AND ties into the wealth of history that Tolkien created. Brilliant. When you've up and finished this Wink smiley face

I would LOVE to see your treatise on the Witch King's thoughts as he was attacking Frodo on Weathertop. Do you think he stabbed his shoulder instead of his heart because at the last moment, he took pity on the hobbit? And that because he knew what awaited Frodo if he claimed the ring, he summoned his resistance to Sauron just enough in that last moment to throw his thrust wide of its mark? Hmmm...

Ariel

The Cursed Queen of Angmar · Thu Sep 18, 2003 5:26 pm

You know, the great thing about OS is that I can download all these big stories as a single document and save them whenever someone posts an update. It is probably one of OS's best features! So, as soon as you want to get the rest of this posted, I'll get caught up and give you a real review. I'm about on chapter 28 in the other place, but I'd love to get the whole thing here. Thanks for posting it!

Heed No Nightly Noises · Thu Sep 18, 2003 5:27 am

Lindorien said
> Whoa! I think a cold shower is what I could use right about now!

Laughing smiley face

I aim to please! Yes, I always thought the poor boy was quite taken with her - in fact of all the ladies he comes in contact with, Goldberry is the one who seems to thrill him the most. It seemed only fair to give him something in canon - if possible - and she seemed the most likely candidate.

The Gift of Iluvatar · Wed Sep 17, 2003 6:40 pm

Lindorien said
> I am not so certain, although she herself defines it as love, that it was actually a sexual feeling she had for Frodo. Certainly, it was a somewhat mature love, but at the same time, I have to wonder if she was not seeing her own sons in this perian and perhaps feeling a twinge for them. So,it is an odd mixture of love between equals, but also of mother-love. Does that make any sense?

Yes, it does, and yes, you are right! There are many kinds of love - and many ways of answering them. I did not intend to have it a sexual feeling mainly because of the difference in species, but also to have it more an agape type of love, with motherly elements, the admiration of the saved for their hero, and just a very pure compassion. I am afraid my tendancy for writing smut acts against me when I try and write something purely innocent. Wink smiley face

Ariel

Heed No Nightly Noises · Wed Sep 17, 2003 5:53 pm

KhazarKhum said
> Lovely, sweet, nasty smut... Smile smiley face

>
> Did you ever read "Sir Gawain & The Green Knight"? I wonder, because the theme of the lady of the house freely offering herself to the guest is central to that work--as is his refusal of such a gift.
>

> khazar

Actually, I have and enjoyed it immensely. But you could tell that, couldn't you? Wink smiley face

I have always seen some parallels to the pagan Green Knight and Tom Bombadil and this tale just naturally followed. My friend Regina gave me the idea to use the dream sequence to complete the tryst in a way compatible with canon and I was off! Wink smiley face

Scattered Leaves · Fri Sep 12, 2003 8:05 pm

Ah! You see? I TOLD you this one was good! My squees when you sent it to me WEREN'T over the top! This story is friggin' poetry! I said so before. Thank you!

Debbie Does The Two Towers · Fri Aug 22, 2003 8:25 pm

Oh, this is even funnier than the last one! Good thing I know where the rest of this is posted... I don't think I could wait for it! Wink smiley face

The Grotto · Thu Jul 31, 2003 10:12 am

233 reads and NO ONE has a comment?!?!?!?

Surprised smiley face

Come on, folks! Throw me a bone!

Surprised smiley face

ops:

A Mother's Day · Sat Jul 19, 2003 3:19 pm

The story is very sweet and the idea is just charming, though I think a beta reader would help both the text and formatting. I read this just as I had put my two little monsters (darlings) down for a nap because I needed the rest, and it was the perfect thing to read for the occasion.

One thing I did notice and, though I am not the world's authority, I do think I an right in this; when you have a quote followed by the 'said so-and-so' I notice you capitalize the word 'said'. You aren't supposed to. Instead of this:

"She won’t know otherwise, Pippin.” Said a voice she recognized as Merry’s.

You should write this:

"She won’t know otherwise, Pippin,” said a voice she recognized as Merry’s.

It isn't two sentences, it's one sentence. Use a comma instead and don't capitalize the next word. If the following line IS a new sentence like this:

“Pippin! Your shirt!” She had walked up to him and could see that the shirt was torn.

then you DO capitalize the 'She' because the above is actually two sentences. Does that make sense?

I used to make this mistake ALL the time until someone pointed it out to me! You are a very good writer and shouldn't let little, easily correctable errors like that detract from an otherwise adorable tale.

Ariel

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Reviews by Ariel