Reviews by KhazarKhum

Singing In The face of Death · Sat Feb 21, 2004 12:49 pm

A somewhat dispassionate poem. Some of the lines are a little awkward--the "But free men etc" was unusually rough.

The imagery was fine, though, and the general structure sound. It needs just a little tweaking to reach its full potential.

Ascension · Sat Feb 21, 2004 2:49 am

All I thought of was--Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. A very moving and effective poem.

The Faithful · Wed Feb 18, 2004 9:38 pm

Wonderfully handled; they are completely and absolutely believeable. Like most couples married a long time, they can read each other at a glance.

Now--when's the next part?? Smile smiley face

Peacemaker · Wed Feb 18, 2004 3:01 pm

A believable Haldir story? Practically nonexistant! Very Happy smiley face

There were a couple of small grammatical flaws, but they didn't harm the flow.

The Cursed Queen of Angmar · Mon Feb 16, 2004 3:56 pm

Thanks and hello!

The next chapter is coming along, and if all goes well y poor betas will have it by the weekend.

Fear No Darkness · Sat Feb 14, 2004 3:45 am

An interesting look at Theoden, a character who is too often ignored. I really liked his mistress, a character whose existence one suspects but can never prove.

As for flaws, I would have to say the use of "Off me" as in "Slay me" in the first chapter. I think that is too modern a phrase, and it clashed mightily against the OE text. Otherwise this is as fine a story as there is on OS.

A Mother's Day · Mon Feb 09, 2004 3:44 am

I forgot to add:

this is the kind of story that makes me angry at the Tolkien people. This would be a wonderful children's book. I can see it now: glowing, loving illustrations; gentle humor; a message for the kids. It's a pity that things like this can't be seen by more people. Very Happy smiley face

A Mother's Day · Mon Feb 09, 2004 3:22 am

I have to agree with Ariel: for all its charm, this needs a thorough betaing. I think if it was run past a good beta, someone who didn't let you charm your way out of it (a la Pippin Wink smiley face

) you'd have an unbeatably fun little work.

The Oath · Sun Feb 08, 2004 3:46 am

You have an interesting premise here. But this does need to be beta'd, because there are several grammatical errors that simply knocked me out of the story.

What Price Love? · Sat Feb 07, 2004 9:13 pm

Are you suggesting that Gandalf & Sauron were once lovers?

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Smile smiley face

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Reviews by KhazarKhum